Bad January IHY!

January 2011..
Probably the WORST start of the year..

See what I have?
Break-up, argue, sick, treatment...
It is totally not like a normal person's life!

Faster pass ah January!!
Let February and Chinese New Year come A.S.A.P!

Memory..

Spin.. Spin.. Spin..
Like a Roulette?
Like a Carousel?
Or..?

I have been thinking lots of things recently..
Nothing to think..
Something to think..
Yet, no solution..
Yet, no answer..

'--I want something--'

Now, the concept is clear..
The content is empty..
I want it, yet I dunno why..
I got the reason wanting it, yet I dunno what I want..
A lot of crossroads ahead..

Is there a chance that..
The sandglass flow upward..?
Bring me Back to December (Taylor Swift)..
And enjoy myself..

Be it, laugh or cry..
Tears of sadness or joy..
I like the moments, I just like it..

'--So, Can I Have It? Yes? No?--'

Someone kept telling me..
'It is all over'
No.. It is not..
But now..
I am just someone without anything..
I lost a lot..

Even worse..
At the same time..
When I think about myself..
I think of others too..
What they feel if I do so..?

'--Why Not? and Why Yes?--'

Sweet and bitter memory..
I hate myself..

-Gaming-

Wtf Dream #2

Before I depart to 'another world'..
You phoned me..
Said nothing..
But.. Only..

'我愿意'

Then we remained silence..

Angry!

Still act as if nothing happen uh?
Gratz your f**king attitude fail my half a year plan~
F**k off idiot!

I know, the thing you cant get by yourself,
So you want me not to get it too uh? :3
Nevermind, I still have another option,
And that grants me more opportunities to have the things I want!!

Now, a f**ker like you will give lots of excuse,
I shall ignore you till I get the things I want,
Another half a year bah, A**Hole!

HaRu-hArU

Don't look back and leave..
Don't find me again and live..
Because I have no regrets from loving you,..
Take only the good memories..
I can bear it in some way..
I can stand in some way..
You should be happy if you are like this..
I become dull day by day..

Credits -> BigBang

MILO恋曲 - 前奏

我想要谈恋爱。。
因为我想随时随刻关心我喜欢的人。。
我不想要谈恋爱。。
因为我不想别人关心我。。

时日不多。。
时间过得很快。。很快。。
恋爱吗。。？

It's late..

Just realized..
I was the one who said it first..
That's why..
..

Maybe I should think deeper first before saying it out..
The consequences of losing her..
My days without it..
And.. A lot more..

Trying to cheer myself up..
End up failing myself again..
Yeah, it was me..
The bad guy..

Guess it is all too late after all..
I had made my decision..
I choose to live without it..
And this is what I get..

There's one more thing..
If I choose A, perhaps I lose only 4 person in that game..
But If I choose B, I lose everything in that game..

Never mind..
I knew I need to sacrifice things..
For my own good too..
Being selfish..
And disappear without telling..
That's me..

It's too late after all..
Just keep that question in my heart..
Let it disappear with me..

-Study-

Days without maple...

Ragnarok...
Movie...
Study!!! <-- Finally got time to do so!

A lot free time nowadays..
Going to get a part time job soon!
Part-Time Setup crew of KLCC!

Okay now I am ready with my new lifestyle!
Gambateh to all too!!

-brb movie then sleep-

Say it again.. Please..

Every day and night after that 'day'..
I wish to hear it.. again..
The magic word..

'Dar'..

Haha.. Guess I was dreaming again..
Be it 0.01% chance for me to hear it again..
Not from others but her..
I will wait..

-Dinner time-

Ragnarok!!

Though it is private server..
Playing it is far away more relaxing than playing maple!

~Sweet~

Wtf dream??!

Dreamt of her again..
Had another bf in maple..

I hate this a lot..
Hate myself a lot..

AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Lunch time ._.!

Lone-ly...

One week ady...
Alone...
Still not used to it...

Could I ask you to come back...?
No, I did something wrong...
I can't do that anymore...

But somehow...
I still need you...
Somehow...

I am still alone...

Look forward?

Perhaps I shall give up waiting those 'miracles' to happen?

Come on, I shall look forward and further instead of trying to fix things back.!

Those things are meant to be broken into pieces, but what I need to do now, is NOT fixing it back!

Hello future, I dun care it is short or long, just drop by to say hi!!

Lame!!!

Fuckers!

Planned something for 2 weeks.
End up being ruined by someone -
who dun even know what is cwkpq,
who nvr involve in planning,
who online just to throw tantrums on me!

Enough saying, i gave up wasting my time!
Brainless bullshit, goodbye!

To U, From Me.

Without you knowing...

I still like you, but I can't be with you..
I still need you, but I am shy to tell you..
I still miss you, like the day I wet my blanket..
I still want you, wish to see you everyday in maple..

I miss the day we mega each other..
I miss the time we hunt together days and nights..
I miss every words you told me..
I miss every seconds we spent together in maple..

Without you knowing...

It was just a dream..
A dream that last 1 month plus..

Thank you, again, thank you.
I had learnt a lot from this dream.

Wish you all the best in future,
be it virtual or real life,
All the best,
and Take Care.

Signing off,
Xiang

One Rainy afternoon...

I should back to my blog more often, update whoever still read/subscribe my blog...

Now, some up-to-date information about myself, whether u wanna know anot...

First, my health level is currently RED!!
Actually I do not know what's wrong with me..
Always not feeling well, headache, faint - most of the time...

Blood cancer...?

I duwan to think too much...
Check-up done, waiting now...
gonna see 中医 this week too...

A more critical question will be - can i stay alive till CNY...?

......

I should rest more and less gaming, I think..
But too bad, I miss those 'gamers'..
-Hand itchy-
-Double click game!-
-PIAK MYSELF!!!-

I am weak now..
And I still wanna try jogging later...?
-Pushing myself into hell huh...?-

Luckily, The God of Rain came, ask me to rest today...
So, I shall listen to Him, ha!

That's all for me now, wish me luck ya :P

Xiang